SportsGuy's Next Intern

My favorite ESPN.com Page 2 columnists, Bill Simmons (SportsGuy) is hosting a contest to find his next intern. The applicants are being asked to answer a series of questions. Since I'm too old to apply for the contest (thanks, SportsGuy. I get it, I'm old), I figured I'd give my answers here.

1. What was your favorite sports moment that you've seen in person?
Ohio State at Michigan, November 22, 1997. I remember every detail of this entire day. I can't even describe the feeling in the Stadium when the band took the field for Pre-Game. I remember just looking up at all the people and thinking that this was going to be something that would stick in my mind forever. The whole game, I just knew, no matter what, we were going to win. I can still hear the roar of the crowd when Woodson broke away from the last defender and it was clear he was headed for the end-zone. As the final seconds ticked off the clock, I remember the pure joy and excitement in the building as everyone realized that we were going to the Rose Bowl and would be undefeated. It was an AWESOME, AWESOME day and I'm so lucky that I got to be there in person. (The Rose Bowl always seemed anti-climatic in some way)

2. What's your favorite sports movie ever and why?
Hoop Dreams. It's not only my favorite sports movie, it's my favorite documentary and one of my all-time favorite movies ever. If you haven't seen it, go rent it right now. You'll be thanking me tomorrow.

People always say to me, "when you get to the NBA, don't forget about me." Well, I should've said back, "if I don't make it to the NBA, don't you forget about me." -William Gates

3. Who's your favorite athlete ever and why?
Overall, I'd have to say #19 Steve Yzerman. He is the quintessential team captain. A classy guy with all the heart in the world. I'll always remember the look on his face when he held the Stanley Cup for the first time. Too bad the idiots in his sport chose to be egocentric babies and sit out during what should have been his farwell season.

4. What do you think was the funniest moment in sports history and why?
This is a tough one. I think I have to go with a drunk Joe Namath slurring "I wanna kiiiiiiiss yoooooou" to a stupified Suzie Kolber. How she held it together, I'll never know!
Honorable Mention: Freddie Mitchell's postgame press conference outfit after the Eagles won the NFC. Hard to top an NFL Wide receiver dressed like an extra in "Guys and Dolls".

5. What's your all-time favorite Saturday Night Live Skit?
It's a toss-up between when Alec Baldwin played Pete Schweddy on the NPR take-off "Delicious Dish". (His delivery is flawless and he never even cracks a smile), and Will Farrell, Ana Gastyer and Sarah Michelle Geller playing the disfunctional family at dinner. (Farrell screaming "I Drive a DODGE STRATUS" is in my top 25 funniest moments ever.

6. What's your all-time favorite Reality-TV moment?
Again a tough choice. I think I'm going to have to go with a classic: David from Real World New Orleans and his heartwarming rendition of his "song"-- "Come on Be My Baby Tonight." The unintentional comedy meter was off the charts.
Honorable Mention: A drunken Mini-Me, peeing in the corner as da Brat thoughtfully reminds him "Verne, baby, this ain't the restroom."